And next year's words await another voice." ~T.S. Eliot
First day of 2012. Rainy and mild on The Esplanade.
Ceri had the foresight to leave the blinds open wide so that we could look upon the city as we went to sleep (see post previous night). Awoke to that skyline under bright, sunny skies. He makes a late breakfast of omelette with pancetta and cheese and onion with caraway rye toast and lots of coffee.
Clouds and rain arrive in the space of two hours. On a lazy day like today, you don't mind.
Later, after some loafing about, listening to CBC radio and reading, we watch the rest of the American Masters doc about Woody Allen which we'd left halfway through a few weeks ago, and then we go out for late lunch/early dinner at Fionn's in The Esplanade.
I walk home against some extraordinary winds – at Queens Quay and York I feel like I am walking without moving! Get home and watch Close Encounters of the Third Kind on TCM and later a good, long conversation with Debbie.
Going to bed early feeling like 2012 is shaping up pretty good already.
The other day my friend Lynn posed the question to her facebook people: “what one word describes your 2010?” My experience in expressive arts tells me that the only way to answer such a question is to answer it quickly. If you respond quickly and think about it later, you can open the door to some unexpected personal insight.
I answered with “New.”
I think it was a good word. In 2010 I changed strategies in a number of realms. Early in the year I re-vamped my blog and moved it to a platform that I think better reflects the spirit behind the writing. In turn, I started photographing more and began to pull together some shots that have further captured the theme I’m going for. I spent a good part of last winter documenting my ideas of “beauty” and the sources of it around me in my daily travels. I was rewarded, again, to find how one step leads to another – and these steps led me straight out of a funk – personal as well as creative.
Later in the year it occurred to me to stop looking for “home” and just to live in a fun spot and let home come to me. I get all over my writing students for resorting to clichés, but it’s a lesson I seem to learn over and over again: get out of the past and the future and get living in the moment. THAT’s when the change happens – not when I'm thinking about it, mourning it, planning it, hoping for it, wishing for it.
Still later in the year, pretty recently, I decided to revamp me. I vowed I would try more, trust more, BE more and stay devoted to reflecting the authentic me. I carried that focus on authenticity around with me as I shopped, in the books I chose, friends I found, and in the ways I approached my jobs and free time endeavours. I knew that the most important part of this personal revamp was to drop some walls – particularly because it also included the return to the pursuit of romantic love. I explored the opening of some chakras and worked at smiling at strangers more often and (sorry another cliché) being the change I want to see. Again with the small steps leading me in directions I never imagined.
So the end of the year arrived, and some wonderful surprises have presented themselves. For different reasons, I’m not writing about them yet. But I can say that I have more than one reason to step forward into 2011 anticipating much more NEW. And I’m filled with optimism and hope that some kind of ball is rolling and that you’ll join me in its path.
It’s day one of a new year. I don't know what the word will be for 2011 – but it doesn't matter. I'm sticking in the now and rolling with the rhythms. I do know that I'm really glad you're here to discover it all along with me.